Yes, it was a very humid July in North Carolina of 1963. The Marine Corp as usual had left one of it female dependant in a pickle. I was that dependant a very pregnant wife with a 18 month old very active son.
Air conditioning was some thing you read about in the paper. TV was just making its way down the East Coast. I remember watching some black and white snow that had some moving figures in the back ground. That was TV and I was unimpressed.
We had purchased a green hassock fan, my feet stayed propped up on it day and night for a little relief.
I awoke in the middle of the night in pain, my very large tummy had shifted from protruding out in the middle to the side. I felt very, very alone even thro I had a toddler in the house. My husband had been send TDY to Washington DC area.
I waited until the men had had to report to work, I called my husbands office. Bob one of the men that worked for him and his wife Betty had been to our house many times playing Yatze. Betty was expecting also but not until after Thanksgiving. Bob came after my toddler, took him to Betty to be taken care of and took me to the base hospital. I had spent too much time on my feet and pulled a muscle allowing my whole stomach to shift to the side. The hospital put me to bed for bed rest. The reason why I was on my feet so much, I had volunteered to help with Vacation Bible School. Not for the love of Bible School but simply because it gave me a two to three hours with my toddler in someone elses care and me with a joyous time with adults. When you are at home alone with a toddler for weeks at a time you jump at the chance to do anything for relief. The Doctor that treated me recognized me from Vacation Bible School Commencement. This Doctor treated me like the best Christian he had ever know because I had done such a foolish thing. I stopped and looked at my reasons for being on my feet and why he thought I had done such a stupid thing. I very selfishly didn't tell him the real reasons.
Fifty four years later a very humid July in East Texas. I find myself very much alone in the middle of a night. This time I have a husband in another bedroom dying of a very large tumor. This tumor is growing day and night the only thing we can do for him is give him pain medication. This time I am really not alone the son I had put in jeopardy 54 years ago by standing on my feet. He is trying to sleep in another bedroom, he finds it hard to sleep at night and is watching TV. This son has left his family and spending time with me and his father while we are waiting on the dying process. Hubby is becoming more confused by the day. I am not sure he is aware of what is happening or why number two son is still here. People are telling us how much together we have every thing and we are so strong to be able to do this. What choice do we have but to do this, we try to think of every thing that has to be done and just do one day at a time. No we are not moaning an crying, I do have my moments of tearing up but we are trusting the Lord to take care of every thing day by day. No we are not waiting for the Lord to make the arrangements we are making them. The Lord just has to be able to get us through each day that comes and trust he know when hubby has had enough and can't take any more. All the grandkids but Steven have been here to say goodbye, we can't find Steven but just hope he sufaces in time. It was good to have all the kid, grandkids and great grands here. Tiring for hubby and me but they all have said goodbye. P and family should have returned late yesterday I am so glad they got to take this vacation as planned. They will be a big help now in sitting with hubby when we need to go out.
Thank heavens for air conditioning the humid is terrible, I am running the air conditioning night and day so I may owe my soul to light company.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Being Baby Sat
I know being a caregiver is like being a babysitter, but having someone with me is like bein baby sat too. Don't get me wrong I appreciate someone else bein in the house with me while hubby is so sick.
Yesterday I did a dumb trick, I had a litttle grease in a little frying pan. I put it on the stove to turn back to liqud. Hubby needed something so I took care of him and by that time the frying pan was smoking. Number one son saw the smoke and picked up the pan just as it broke into flame. It took me a few minutes to remember and find the flour to put it out. We both knew not to put water on the flames. Now number one son thinks its not safe to leave me alone. Number two will be here this afternoon he has moved his flight up a day.
Hubby is taking more and more pain medication. I had to put three patches on him today. The patches are only 25 mg so they aren't very strong. I have to keep giving him pain pills off and on all day.
We took hubby out to lunch yesterday. We took him to Dairy Palace to get his favorite Taco Salad. He ate the meat and cheese off the top and very little lettuce. We made another stop to check on my cell phone as usual no information available from them. Number one son is putting me on his friends and family plan that will save me about $50.00 a month. That will help when every thing shakes out. We also picked up the mail all this is a pouring down rain. We got home being very wet but it all worked out.
Yesterday I did a dumb trick, I had a litttle grease in a little frying pan. I put it on the stove to turn back to liqud. Hubby needed something so I took care of him and by that time the frying pan was smoking. Number one son saw the smoke and picked up the pan just as it broke into flame. It took me a few minutes to remember and find the flour to put it out. We both knew not to put water on the flames. Now number one son thinks its not safe to leave me alone. Number two will be here this afternoon he has moved his flight up a day.
Hubby is taking more and more pain medication. I had to put three patches on him today. The patches are only 25 mg so they aren't very strong. I have to keep giving him pain pills off and on all day.
We took hubby out to lunch yesterday. We took him to Dairy Palace to get his favorite Taco Salad. He ate the meat and cheese off the top and very little lettuce. We made another stop to check on my cell phone as usual no information available from them. Number one son is putting me on his friends and family plan that will save me about $50.00 a month. That will help when every thing shakes out. We also picked up the mail all this is a pouring down rain. We got home being very wet but it all worked out.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Funeral Arrangments in Advance
We are going today to the funeral home to get some questions answered. It seems really strange to be going to the funeral home in advance. It seems to be the only place I can get my questions answered.
I can't find any way of contacting the National Cemetery. I have been told that it is the responsibility of the funeral home to contact them.
P is going with me. I am really glad I am not going to be alone.
I can't find any way of contacting the National Cemetery. I have been told that it is the responsibility of the funeral home to contact them.
P is going with me. I am really glad I am not going to be alone.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Changes becareful of changes they will change the rest of your life.
The lyrics to this old song keep going through my head.
Friday night after a trip to the er and a cat scan. We discovered that hubby has a pancreatic tumor. The tumor is as big as a watermelon. It has effected his liver and his lung. It is too big for an operation and chemo will just make him sick. The result regardless is terminal.
We brought hubby home yesterday and hospice came to enroll us today. Albuquerque son arrived today to stay and help me.
The old Roger Witaker son Changes keeps going through and through my head.
Friday night after a trip to the er and a cat scan. We discovered that hubby has a pancreatic tumor. The tumor is as big as a watermelon. It has effected his liver and his lung. It is too big for an operation and chemo will just make him sick. The result regardless is terminal.
We brought hubby home yesterday and hospice came to enroll us today. Albuquerque son arrived today to stay and help me.
The old Roger Witaker son Changes keeps going through and through my head.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Nasty Blog
I am very unhappy with both of my sons. Last Sunday was Father's Day and neither of them did anything for him. I know he can't hear over the telephone but he can read. He may have ALZ but he is still aware of everything that goes on around him and he can hear. We went to church and he heard a Father's Day Sermon. He knew it was Father's Day, I even gave him a new electric razor for the day and he is using it.
Daughters family was sick so it was very quiet around hear.
Your fathers mind is a lot better than his body these days, I have been concerned for some time and now daughter is concerned too. We are going to try and get him in to see his primary care this week. Daughter wants to talk to the doc.
Daughters family was sick so it was very quiet around hear.
Your fathers mind is a lot better than his body these days, I have been concerned for some time and now daughter is concerned too. We are going to try and get him in to see his primary care this week. Daughter wants to talk to the doc.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
No Big D,eal
I have had several people tell me lately that I can doing such a great thing by taking care of my hubby while he has Alz. FiftySix years, seven months, and two weeks I have fixed breakfast for both of us, washed both of our clothes, cleaned the house we both live in, washed dishes or loaded dish washer. The only difference is that I now have to fix a pill box once a month for both of us. I have to keep tract of his medications, and doctor appointments. I have to do all the driving. I have to do all the thinking and make all the decisions, whether they are right or wrong.
Why would I make any big changes like putting him in nursing home. The extra things I do, are not that big a deal. I can't see changing my way of life because of the few extra things I do. The biggest deal is not having anyone to share this with. I don't have anyone to talk to but sometimes I should listen to him more. He told me on the way home from Las Vegas that he didn't want to go any where any more. He just want to stay in the little home we have created here in East Texas and rest. This time I think I will listen to hime and we will stay at home. All of the kids will have to come and see us.
Why would I make any big changes like putting him in nursing home. The extra things I do, are not that big a deal. I can't see changing my way of life because of the few extra things I do. The biggest deal is not having anyone to share this with. I don't have anyone to talk to but sometimes I should listen to him more. He told me on the way home from Las Vegas that he didn't want to go any where any more. He just want to stay in the little home we have created here in East Texas and rest. This time I think I will listen to hime and we will stay at home. All of the kids will have to come and see us.
Hme Again
We are home again, thank heavens, air travel is very stressful.
We didn't get to leave without a product of the last two stressful weeks of May. A couple of days before Sunday June 2nd I had a little rash across my cheeks. I just put some cream on it and forgot it. Sunday June 2nd I couldn't forget it my right eye was swollen shut. Faithful P got up early and took me to the emergency room at Kaufman. It was no brainer for the doc I had hive possibly from some of my medication. Cure massive dosses of preison. I was finally down to just 1 mg in the morning and 1 at night. Now we are starting over with huge mg's. I just looked like I had spent too much time out in the sun and we went on to Las Vegas. The air travel with Southwest is really the big bus line of Texas. Our flight stopped at El Paseo before our lay over in Phoenix. Our next stop was Las Vegas and our wheel chair was given to someone else and we had to walk to the baggage. Sister-in-law had our luggage and was frantily looking for us by the time we got to the baggage.
Our stay in Las Vegas was comfortable in a nice condo, the only problem was that they never came in to clean up, but we kept it up pretty well. We ate out all the time. We found Maloffs cancino the Palms it was huge. I tried to reach Phil but got tranferred time and time again so I finally gave up. Sister-in-law took us to Gardno's for a Birthday dinner. The time in Las Vegas was suppouse to be a rest. Well it was an enforced rest, we really needed it but was a pushed rest.
I picked up a easy sudoku book at one of our stops in an airport. I have worked steady and hard at learning to do this game. I think I have finally managed to do some of the puzzles, I'm on 65 and still going strong. I am really feeling proud of myself that I have managed to learn how to do the easy puzzles.
Our flight home was suppose to be a stright threw flight but quess what we had to stop at Amarillo before we could fly to Dallas. Our wheel chair met us and we were transfered to a moving cart. The cart could only go part way so we were dumped half way and had to walk the rest of the way to baggage. After we picked up the luggage was walked half of the way home to get the car. We have been trying to rest up since we got home, it's really good to be home. It seems very strange to not have Melissa with us.
We didn't get to leave without a product of the last two stressful weeks of May. A couple of days before Sunday June 2nd I had a little rash across my cheeks. I just put some cream on it and forgot it. Sunday June 2nd I couldn't forget it my right eye was swollen shut. Faithful P got up early and took me to the emergency room at Kaufman. It was no brainer for the doc I had hive possibly from some of my medication. Cure massive dosses of preison. I was finally down to just 1 mg in the morning and 1 at night. Now we are starting over with huge mg's. I just looked like I had spent too much time out in the sun and we went on to Las Vegas. The air travel with Southwest is really the big bus line of Texas. Our flight stopped at El Paseo before our lay over in Phoenix. Our next stop was Las Vegas and our wheel chair was given to someone else and we had to walk to the baggage. Sister-in-law had our luggage and was frantily looking for us by the time we got to the baggage.
Our stay in Las Vegas was comfortable in a nice condo, the only problem was that they never came in to clean up, but we kept it up pretty well. We ate out all the time. We found Maloffs cancino the Palms it was huge. I tried to reach Phil but got tranferred time and time again so I finally gave up. Sister-in-law took us to Gardno's for a Birthday dinner. The time in Las Vegas was suppouse to be a rest. Well it was an enforced rest, we really needed it but was a pushed rest.
I picked up a easy sudoku book at one of our stops in an airport. I have worked steady and hard at learning to do this game. I think I have finally managed to do some of the puzzles, I'm on 65 and still going strong. I am really feeling proud of myself that I have managed to learn how to do the easy puzzles.
Our flight home was suppose to be a stright threw flight but quess what we had to stop at Amarillo before we could fly to Dallas. Our wheel chair met us and we were transfered to a moving cart. The cart could only go part way so we were dumped half way and had to walk the rest of the way to baggage. After we picked up the luggage was walked half of the way home to get the car. We have been trying to rest up since we got home, it's really good to be home. It seems very strange to not have Melissa with us.
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Busy Two Weeks
Boy has this been a busy two weeks, I can't believe we have accomplished as much as we have in the last two weeks. P and I sat down and planned three parties two weeks ago. We had to cram a graduation into that time frame. P had two days of doctors appointments and tests, plus working.
Melissa had make up work and lots of home work. They really poured it on the last two weeks. Melissa had all the fun things that finish up senior year. She had prom, senior trip, and the receipe book and a english paper on Elizabeth, some questions she had to answer. Poor gal she really had her nose to the grind stone, while trying to do the senior play dates. Melissa's mom and dad were coming so we ask B and K from Oklahoma to come also. My 75 birthday is coming up shortly. We tried to plan a graduation party for Melissa but she wanted to take it over. She did a beautiful job of making invitation with rubber stamps, unfortunately her written on the invitations was hard to read, we even included a map as to how to find the house. She passed out 20 invitations some at church and some at school.
P made invitations for my 75th birthday tea party. I only gave out 4 invitation besides the family. The managers at the village, a dog walker that I had become friendly with, and our wonderful massage theaptists.
We planned a unbirthday party for M. She is the last one of my family that has the December 3oth birthday. That is a bad time to ask school kids to come to a birthday party. We planned a dressup unbirthday party.
Melissa's mom and dad arrived just in time to see her get dressed and drive off in the Tarus to her graduation program. The program was well documented with lots of photos. Family came home and collaped after the program.
Melissa and I had spent all day Thursday making tea sandwiches for my birthday party. P made the cake and tea. Saturday we went to P for my tea birthday party. It was good time. on P's back patio. The weather coorperated and was so pleasant it was hard to end it. All my kids were there and almost everyone I ask. One of our massage gals had to go the hospital with a family member.
After we left the tea party we rushed home and set up for Melissa's graduation party. We had to move it inside as the weather looked like rain. Re-arranged the living room and setup for about 20 kids. Only one adult one of the massage gals came because Melissa had worked for them some last summer. We had a great time talking and Pat, Melissa's dad and my author son entertained us with a history lesson.
We had M unbirthday party today, cupcakes, punch and lots and lots of candy as door prizes and game prizes. M passed out about 20 invitations and 6 very dressed up little girls arrived in long dress, hats, jewlery, boas, and high heels. They were not too sure how a unbirthday worked but they had numbers on pinwheels the picked out. They went one by one and opened a gift they could pick a new gift or the one that had been opened. Only one little girl was brave enough to take what had been already opened. I think they were all too curious what was in the unopened gifts. The little girls left with several bags of candy as well as a gift. I think the dressup unbirthday party was a hug success.
I told P that the two of us should go into a business planning parties. She said fine as long as some one else did the work. I'm not sure how that would work, I'll have to think on it.
Monday Hubby and I will be flying off to Las Vegas to spend the week with his sister and family. We are planning another birthday party and hubby's sister and have birthdays close together. I am hoping hubby can make the trip OK. I have ordered a wheel chair for him I hope we can make our plan change in Phoenix alright.
Next time I blog I will tell you all about it.
Melissa had make up work and lots of home work. They really poured it on the last two weeks. Melissa had all the fun things that finish up senior year. She had prom, senior trip, and the receipe book and a english paper on Elizabeth, some questions she had to answer. Poor gal she really had her nose to the grind stone, while trying to do the senior play dates. Melissa's mom and dad were coming so we ask B and K from Oklahoma to come also. My 75 birthday is coming up shortly. We tried to plan a graduation party for Melissa but she wanted to take it over. She did a beautiful job of making invitation with rubber stamps, unfortunately her written on the invitations was hard to read, we even included a map as to how to find the house. She passed out 20 invitations some at church and some at school.
P made invitations for my 75th birthday tea party. I only gave out 4 invitation besides the family. The managers at the village, a dog walker that I had become friendly with, and our wonderful massage theaptists.
We planned a unbirthday party for M. She is the last one of my family that has the December 3oth birthday. That is a bad time to ask school kids to come to a birthday party. We planned a dressup unbirthday party.
Melissa's mom and dad arrived just in time to see her get dressed and drive off in the Tarus to her graduation program. The program was well documented with lots of photos. Family came home and collaped after the program.
Melissa and I had spent all day Thursday making tea sandwiches for my birthday party. P made the cake and tea. Saturday we went to P for my tea birthday party. It was good time. on P's back patio. The weather coorperated and was so pleasant it was hard to end it. All my kids were there and almost everyone I ask. One of our massage gals had to go the hospital with a family member.
After we left the tea party we rushed home and set up for Melissa's graduation party. We had to move it inside as the weather looked like rain. Re-arranged the living room and setup for about 20 kids. Only one adult one of the massage gals came because Melissa had worked for them some last summer. We had a great time talking and Pat, Melissa's dad and my author son entertained us with a history lesson.
We had M unbirthday party today, cupcakes, punch and lots and lots of candy as door prizes and game prizes. M passed out about 20 invitations and 6 very dressed up little girls arrived in long dress, hats, jewlery, boas, and high heels. They were not too sure how a unbirthday worked but they had numbers on pinwheels the picked out. They went one by one and opened a gift they could pick a new gift or the one that had been opened. Only one little girl was brave enough to take what had been already opened. I think they were all too curious what was in the unopened gifts. The little girls left with several bags of candy as well as a gift. I think the dressup unbirthday party was a hug success.
I told P that the two of us should go into a business planning parties. She said fine as long as some one else did the work. I'm not sure how that would work, I'll have to think on it.
Monday Hubby and I will be flying off to Las Vegas to spend the week with his sister and family. We are planning another birthday party and hubby's sister and have birthdays close together. I am hoping hubby can make the trip OK. I have ordered a wheel chair for him I hope we can make our plan change in Phoenix alright.
Next time I blog I will tell you all about it.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
43 years ago
Forty three years ago I spent the day in the hospital. It was also the only day that my third son and fourth child lived and died.
This was a warm and spring day in Albuquerque of course it got hot later on in the day. My mom and dad were there to take care of the other three kiddo's. My mom was the only family member to see Timothy. I was told he had dark hair and was a purfect baby. A inexperienced doctor let me lay in labor while the baby was in distrest. The baby had been without oxgen so long that he was brain dead. When the OB GYN got there they just delivered the baby and didn't try to get it to breath. My mom said she heard him cry, they told everyone that his lungs weren't developed enough to breath. He was only two weeks early so that wasn't true. The OB GYN told me that if I had been going to a OB GYN I would have had a live baby but he wouldn't testify in court to that fact. Unfortunately that inexperienced doctor is still practicing.
Just thought somebody ought to remember Timmy today.
This was a warm and spring day in Albuquerque of course it got hot later on in the day. My mom and dad were there to take care of the other three kiddo's. My mom was the only family member to see Timothy. I was told he had dark hair and was a purfect baby. A inexperienced doctor let me lay in labor while the baby was in distrest. The baby had been without oxgen so long that he was brain dead. When the OB GYN got there they just delivered the baby and didn't try to get it to breath. My mom said she heard him cry, they told everyone that his lungs weren't developed enough to breath. He was only two weeks early so that wasn't true. The OB GYN told me that if I had been going to a OB GYN I would have had a live baby but he wouldn't testify in court to that fact. Unfortunately that inexperienced doctor is still practicing.
Just thought somebody ought to remember Timmy today.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Home
I haven't read today's SS lesson it is entitled The Eternal Home. The writer of these lesson has been very good. I just wish the various teachers in our SS class would teach out of the quarterly instead of trying to push pre-milliumism. They keep talking rapture where there isn't any and today she even got off on intelligent design. Annie called tonight to tell me how sick her hubby is, he has been in the hospitel. He has had several heart attacks, a pace maker installed and a stroke. He doesn't sound good at all. I hurt so for Annie, I wish I could be there to help. I don't know what I could do accept hold her hand but I could at least do that.
I started thinking this morning in SS about home. When Hubby and I were getting ready to retire. B and G were remolding that house in Farmington, they wanted hubby and I to sell our house and move in with them. The house would be big enough for all of us and I would have been fun. It was a tempting idea but we valued our independence too much to go that route. We did spend a lot of time up there and running around with them. I wouldn't trade one minute of it. We had such a great time. As things stand now it would have been disastrous for us. G couldn't and hasn't been able to handle hubby's ALZ. We tried to go on cruise with them after hubby started having problems and G would handle it. I don't blame G some people just can't stand to see someone they spent so much time with go away like he has.
Next Jean and I always talked about living together particularly after John died and I really think we would have done it. But, she was diagnosed with ALZ and P had cancer and we moved to Texas. Jean died a little over a year ago and I can't tell you how much I miss her. Jean didn't have any big major heath problem. We talked so much about not wanting to live with a quality of life. I think she just gave up and didn' t want to live anymore.
Annie and I always teased that we should rent an apartment and get away from everyone and live together. Now her hubby is in a life threating way and mine is going down more every day. We never know where life will take us and we may never know where home is or who is living in that home.
Nice Mother's Day, we went to SS and Church and back to P for lunch. P gave me a great Mother's Day card she had made complete with family pictures. The card was very professional. Pat wished me a Happy Mothers Day after Melissa called her mom to wish her one. They will be here in about 2 weeks. Melissa and I spent the afternoon making her invitations to her graduation party. Annie had received her invitation to my 75 birthday and called to tell me about it. I still have the local invitations to give out.
I started thinking this morning in SS about home. When Hubby and I were getting ready to retire. B and G were remolding that house in Farmington, they wanted hubby and I to sell our house and move in with them. The house would be big enough for all of us and I would have been fun. It was a tempting idea but we valued our independence too much to go that route. We did spend a lot of time up there and running around with them. I wouldn't trade one minute of it. We had such a great time. As things stand now it would have been disastrous for us. G couldn't and hasn't been able to handle hubby's ALZ. We tried to go on cruise with them after hubby started having problems and G would handle it. I don't blame G some people just can't stand to see someone they spent so much time with go away like he has.
Next Jean and I always talked about living together particularly after John died and I really think we would have done it. But, she was diagnosed with ALZ and P had cancer and we moved to Texas. Jean died a little over a year ago and I can't tell you how much I miss her. Jean didn't have any big major heath problem. We talked so much about not wanting to live with a quality of life. I think she just gave up and didn' t want to live anymore.
Annie and I always teased that we should rent an apartment and get away from everyone and live together. Now her hubby is in a life threating way and mine is going down more every day. We never know where life will take us and we may never know where home is or who is living in that home.
Nice Mother's Day, we went to SS and Church and back to P for lunch. P gave me a great Mother's Day card she had made complete with family pictures. The card was very professional. Pat wished me a Happy Mothers Day after Melissa called her mom to wish her one. They will be here in about 2 weeks. Melissa and I spent the afternoon making her invitations to her graduation party. Annie had received her invitation to my 75 birthday and called to tell me about it. I still have the local invitations to give out.
Friday, May 04, 2007
Rant
The rest of the family can blog ranting so now is my turn.
John Stossel on 20/20 lied on TV when he trashed the public schools in America and I hadn't watched 20/20 sence then.
Why the TV was on 20/20 tonight I don't know but he was trashing
Ethoanol (?). I'm not sure whether it is the answer to our dependence oil but at least they are trying to do something. Stossel had someone from Cato Institute he was interviewing. The guy from Cato was saying that all the money we are paying to buy oil would be used to buy corn so that we could make Ethoanol. The idea was the poor people that are making a fortune from high oil prices would lose money. The public would be paying to buy corn to make Ethoanol wouldn't that be terrible that the greedy guys in the oil pipe line would loose money. I know better than to watch 20/20 again. How do we allow this guy on primetime TV to spout all the propaganda .
Do people really believe all of junk.
Hey we are doing well Melissa seems to have passed all of her classes. She has turned in 3 big projects she has very well and one and barely passing on another. I haven't heard about the big one she spend so much time one. We are going to Home Depot to put in an application tomorrow and then to First Monday. She did really well getting all of her weekend work tonight so she has all weekend to do what she wants. Youth group going to SpiderMan movie Sunday afternoon and she is going.
We are counting down the days until graduation. They practiced today and she finally realized it was going to happen and she got very excited.
Maybe we can all get excited for her.
John Stossel on 20/20 lied on TV when he trashed the public schools in America and I hadn't watched 20/20 sence then.
Why the TV was on 20/20 tonight I don't know but he was trashing
Ethoanol (?). I'm not sure whether it is the answer to our dependence oil but at least they are trying to do something. Stossel had someone from Cato Institute he was interviewing. The guy from Cato was saying that all the money we are paying to buy oil would be used to buy corn so that we could make Ethoanol. The idea was the poor people that are making a fortune from high oil prices would lose money. The public would be paying to buy corn to make Ethoanol wouldn't that be terrible that the greedy guys in the oil pipe line would loose money. I know better than to watch 20/20 again. How do we allow this guy on primetime TV to spout all the propaganda .
Do people really believe all of junk.
Hey we are doing well Melissa seems to have passed all of her classes. She has turned in 3 big projects she has very well and one and barely passing on another. I haven't heard about the big one she spend so much time one. We are going to Home Depot to put in an application tomorrow and then to First Monday. She did really well getting all of her weekend work tonight so she has all weekend to do what she wants. Youth group going to SpiderMan movie Sunday afternoon and she is going.
We are counting down the days until graduation. They practiced today and she finally realized it was going to happen and she got very excited.
Maybe we can all get excited for her.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
On my Blog
Well, I finally got on my blog, but I still can't comment on anyone elses blog.
I still have shingles it has been over a month now. I have had so many different prescriptions, but nothing has helped. They have given me lot of pain pills and I keep having to take more and more of it just to keep on my feet. I still have to feed hubby and put dishes in the dish washer. I still have to get Melissa up and off to school in the mornings. The pain in my left side and back is un-describable. It burns and tingles and is always there, if I sit still long enough it goes away but then moments later its back again in full force. I have stopped my life and just stay in a nighty that doesn't touch me I go from bed to couch and back to bed. If I have to go somewhere I just double up on pain pills and tough the pain out.
I am sitting here waiting for Melissa to come home from the Prom. I can't believe she insisted on going to the Prom stage. She turned down a couple of boys asking her, she looked beautiful in her dark blue and silver slinky dress. She spent the day getting ready she had her finger nails and her toe nails done this morning and her hair in a french twist this afternoon. P showed her how to do her makeup yesterday so she was able to do that herself. She put her dress on last night and we went through all of my jewelry trying all of it. My rhinestones with the red stones looked the best. The ear rings were so old( hubby bought that set for me shortly after we were married) they had screw backs. I wired the old earrings to a loop of rhinestones for pierced ears that Melissa had they really look good. P bought Melissa a beautiful corsage of white baby rose buds. Melissa was in such a rush to go that I didn't get any pictures. I am hoping to get some when she gets home. We took a dry run last week to see where this place was for the Prom. It is about 30 miles from here out in the deep country. I feel strange letting her go by herself. The dance is over early so she should be home soon.
This was one of the big things that Melissa wanted to do this year. She wanted to go to another Prom and she wants to graduate from high school. We are closing in on completing these things for her. I am not sure I can help her anymore than this. She still needs so much support to go on and make something of her life. It is not fair for her to be tied down to helping take care of us. If I get some pictures of her in her slinky dress I will post them.
I still have shingles it has been over a month now. I have had so many different prescriptions, but nothing has helped. They have given me lot of pain pills and I keep having to take more and more of it just to keep on my feet. I still have to feed hubby and put dishes in the dish washer. I still have to get Melissa up and off to school in the mornings. The pain in my left side and back is un-describable. It burns and tingles and is always there, if I sit still long enough it goes away but then moments later its back again in full force. I have stopped my life and just stay in a nighty that doesn't touch me I go from bed to couch and back to bed. If I have to go somewhere I just double up on pain pills and tough the pain out.
I am sitting here waiting for Melissa to come home from the Prom. I can't believe she insisted on going to the Prom stage. She turned down a couple of boys asking her, she looked beautiful in her dark blue and silver slinky dress. She spent the day getting ready she had her finger nails and her toe nails done this morning and her hair in a french twist this afternoon. P showed her how to do her makeup yesterday so she was able to do that herself. She put her dress on last night and we went through all of my jewelry trying all of it. My rhinestones with the red stones looked the best. The ear rings were so old( hubby bought that set for me shortly after we were married) they had screw backs. I wired the old earrings to a loop of rhinestones for pierced ears that Melissa had they really look good. P bought Melissa a beautiful corsage of white baby rose buds. Melissa was in such a rush to go that I didn't get any pictures. I am hoping to get some when she gets home. We took a dry run last week to see where this place was for the Prom. It is about 30 miles from here out in the deep country. I feel strange letting her go by herself. The dance is over early so she should be home soon.
This was one of the big things that Melissa wanted to do this year. She wanted to go to another Prom and she wants to graduate from high school. We are closing in on completing these things for her. I am not sure I can help her anymore than this. She still needs so much support to go on and make something of her life. It is not fair for her to be tied down to helping take care of us. If I get some pictures of her in her slinky dress I will post them.
Monday, March 19, 2007
Update
I went to the doctor this afternoon. I had a pain in my side for about three days and Nights. I thought I had a tummy problem. I also developed a rash on my back and side where the pain has been. The doc patiently listened to my theory about my pain. Then when I showed her my rash. She jumped at the answer. I have shingles. Oh, why oh why didn't I get the shot to prevent this when it first came out. Aunt Dena has been suffering with shingles for the last three years. I am hoping we caught this early enough for the medication to work.
Just trying to lower my stress level now so that I can deal with this latest development.
Just trying to lower my stress level now so that I can deal with this latest development.
New Info
Well, the book review went well today. They seemed to be very interested in the book. I donated a copy for the church library. They were fighting over who would get to read it first.
One of the ladies had said that money had been donated to the Canton Public Library in her name for a book. She got to choose what book she wanted in the library she was going to ask for P book to be put in the library. I told her she could order it from Amazon.com. She is going to get Canton Public Library to order the book for the library.
She may get a book ordered by amazon yet.
The mission group wants P to talk to them when you are in town. But of course it won't be at one of there regular meetings.
One of the ladies had said that money had been donated to the Canton Public Library in her name for a book. She got to choose what book she wanted in the library she was going to ask for P book to be put in the library. I told her she could order it from Amazon.com. She is going to get Canton Public Library to order the book for the library.
She may get a book ordered by amazon yet.
The mission group wants P to talk to them when you are in town. But of course it won't be at one of there regular meetings.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
Still Problems
Google won't let me start another blog. So I may not be able to give comments on any of your blogs.
Strange but proud moment this morning. Melissa was in a choir robe sitting in the front row of the choir in church. I do believe she is the first one of my grands that has sung in a church choir.
Many years ago I sat in the front row of a choir with Melissa's mother sitting next to me. I'm not sure how long we sat, side by side in the choir but it was a while. When number two son came home from the singles weekend in Glorieta he told me about the great girl he met there. After some more questions I discovered he was talking about my partner from the choir. To make a long story short. They were married within the year.
The preacher this morning told me he was very pleased that Melissa was singing in the choir. One of the older ladies in the choir also stopped me after church and told me how please she was the Melissa wanted to sing in the choir. All my kids sang in the youth choir and adult choirs. But Melissa as far as I know is the first one of the grands.
Well tomorrow I give a book review of P book. I'm not sure I'm up to it but I am going to try.
I was so glad to see the picture of Cottonwood Mall and the poster about P booksigning. I'm so sorry we won't be there to be a part of the booksigning. Melissa and I were thrilled.
It's time to sign another lease for the house. I don't want to move, I am pleased with the house but it is so scary to sign up for another year. It always makes me so anxious to try and see a whole year down the road. We have been here over 18 months but trying to out quess what will happen even 6 months down the road is scary. I quess I will just have to close my eyes and sign it.
Strange but proud moment this morning. Melissa was in a choir robe sitting in the front row of the choir in church. I do believe she is the first one of my grands that has sung in a church choir.
Many years ago I sat in the front row of a choir with Melissa's mother sitting next to me. I'm not sure how long we sat, side by side in the choir but it was a while. When number two son came home from the singles weekend in Glorieta he told me about the great girl he met there. After some more questions I discovered he was talking about my partner from the choir. To make a long story short. They were married within the year.
The preacher this morning told me he was very pleased that Melissa was singing in the choir. One of the older ladies in the choir also stopped me after church and told me how please she was the Melissa wanted to sing in the choir. All my kids sang in the youth choir and adult choirs. But Melissa as far as I know is the first one of the grands.
Well tomorrow I give a book review of P book. I'm not sure I'm up to it but I am going to try.
I was so glad to see the picture of Cottonwood Mall and the poster about P booksigning. I'm so sorry we won't be there to be a part of the booksigning. Melissa and I were thrilled.
It's time to sign another lease for the house. I don't want to move, I am pleased with the house but it is so scary to sign up for another year. It always makes me so anxious to try and see a whole year down the road. We have been here over 18 months but trying to out quess what will happen even 6 months down the road is scary. I quess I will just have to close my eyes and sign it.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
Confused
This changing blogs from blogspot to google has messed everything up. I can't post to anybody elses blog and I can't get into my blog very often. They say my password is wrong but they won't give me another one. I keep e-mailing them and they ignore me. If I am forced to start over again. When I start a new blog it will be under the name anothercaregiver. Can't we find some bloging spot that we can really use?
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
I'm Blogging
It is difficult to blog when every few days we have a melt down every few days.
The last two weeks have been very difficult. Melissa came home from her last TAS test with the news that a boy she had been talking with died. This shook her up and I'm concerned that she blew her test. She wrote her essay by reviewing a TV show instead of writting from personal experience. So its anybodys quess if they will accept that as a writting assignment or if they will just not accept it. If she doesn't pass this writting test she doesn't graduate. We have been butting heads at every turn.
I remember having a few screaming matches with the kids when they were at home but with Melissa this last weeks its been at least two or three a week. I'm really too old for these melt downs. my emotions won't handle it. I have played my last card by calling her mom and dad and having her talk with them.
Hubby has not been doing too well. He is sleeping almost all day, he is eating very little. He is down to about 170 lbs for someone that use to weight 225 that is a lot. I am hoping this is just temporary.
It is time to sign another lease for the house I am afraid to sign one for a year but I can't move.
I don't have the strength, money or a place to go. I'm very comfortable here but if hubby has to go into a nursing home I can't afford it.
Pray for us that we get through these next two and half months.
The last two weeks have been very difficult. Melissa came home from her last TAS test with the news that a boy she had been talking with died. This shook her up and I'm concerned that she blew her test. She wrote her essay by reviewing a TV show instead of writting from personal experience. So its anybodys quess if they will accept that as a writting assignment or if they will just not accept it. If she doesn't pass this writting test she doesn't graduate. We have been butting heads at every turn.
I remember having a few screaming matches with the kids when they were at home but with Melissa this last weeks its been at least two or three a week. I'm really too old for these melt downs. my emotions won't handle it. I have played my last card by calling her mom and dad and having her talk with them.
Hubby has not been doing too well. He is sleeping almost all day, he is eating very little. He is down to about 170 lbs for someone that use to weight 225 that is a lot. I am hoping this is just temporary.
It is time to sign another lease for the house I am afraid to sign one for a year but I can't move.
I don't have the strength, money or a place to go. I'm very comfortable here but if hubby has to go into a nursing home I can't afford it.
Pray for us that we get through these next two and half months.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Sunday School Class up in Arms
Well, I wasn't the only one that was upset about that SS lesson. The class exploded about the lesson but the teacher wouldn't let us discuss it. He proceeded with what was suppose to be the lesson but it had nothing to do with what was in the lesson book. So I am really confused about this class. One of the ladies that I had made friends with from the retired teachers group is in that class. She was most vocale about not liking the lesson, I made copies of all of your wonderful responses and gave them to her.
The responses I got were wonderful 7 of them right away. I think son P was most understandable. Anyway I am not upset about the lesson or the class any more.
I was invited to the ladies missionary circle that met yesterday, nice group of ladies. They were asking for people to give devotionals. I volunteered I am going to do a review of P book in March. With the review that is on line and having read the book I hope they will want to have a copy.
Well, today is the make or break day for Melissa, today is the last time she can take this TAK test and past the writting portion. If she doesn't pass this test she can't graduate and all this year is in vain. I am a lot more worried than she is, I so want to her get her act together and make something of herself. P and I have really wondered where we missed her pleas for help when she was little. We look back now an see so many of them and we didn't do anything about them. She has another appointment with her counselor tonight. Our routine for the morning is not going well. I am trying to make her aware of the cost of food and drink. I am making her do menus and a shopping list and keep track of how much things cost. She is so wastful with food and drink. She has been doing better this week.
Saturday we played hooky and went to Mesquite to the shopping mall Melissa had not been there yet. Michelle and her other grandma went with us. We had a lovely lunch at Saltgrass.
Michelle didn't feel good all day she ran a fever Sunday and D took her to doc yesterday. She has the flu, I hope the rest of us don't get it. We all had flu shots including Michelle but that doesn't seem to be the strain of flu everyone is coming down with.
P has chemo on Wednesday and I am taking her. I have a doc appointment with a new doc on Thursday. Friday P and I want to go to Dallas to see B and hear him speak at the Mainstream Convocation. Weather is suppose to be about 70 degrees all week, I hope so I'm tried of the cold and wind.
They made me upgrade to google today, I have been trying to avoid it as everybody else has had trouble with people being able to post. I hope somebody posts so I can see if it is going to work.
The responses I got were wonderful 7 of them right away. I think son P was most understandable. Anyway I am not upset about the lesson or the class any more.
I was invited to the ladies missionary circle that met yesterday, nice group of ladies. They were asking for people to give devotionals. I volunteered I am going to do a review of P book in March. With the review that is on line and having read the book I hope they will want to have a copy.
Well, today is the make or break day for Melissa, today is the last time she can take this TAK test and past the writting portion. If she doesn't pass this test she can't graduate and all this year is in vain. I am a lot more worried than she is, I so want to her get her act together and make something of herself. P and I have really wondered where we missed her pleas for help when she was little. We look back now an see so many of them and we didn't do anything about them. She has another appointment with her counselor tonight. Our routine for the morning is not going well. I am trying to make her aware of the cost of food and drink. I am making her do menus and a shopping list and keep track of how much things cost. She is so wastful with food and drink. She has been doing better this week.
Saturday we played hooky and went to Mesquite to the shopping mall Melissa had not been there yet. Michelle and her other grandma went with us. We had a lovely lunch at Saltgrass.
Michelle didn't feel good all day she ran a fever Sunday and D took her to doc yesterday. She has the flu, I hope the rest of us don't get it. We all had flu shots including Michelle but that doesn't seem to be the strain of flu everyone is coming down with.
P has chemo on Wednesday and I am taking her. I have a doc appointment with a new doc on Thursday. Friday P and I want to go to Dallas to see B and hear him speak at the Mainstream Convocation. Weather is suppose to be about 70 degrees all week, I hope so I'm tried of the cold and wind.
They made me upgrade to google today, I have been trying to avoid it as everybody else has had trouble with people being able to post. I hope somebody posts so I can see if it is going to work.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Theological Question
Well, we did it yesterday we officially became Methodist. The first Sunday School class we sat through has me asking many, many questions. I am in hopes someone out there in blogging land has some answers.
Lesson: Life After Death
Resurrection is not immortality. Immortality is the Greek belief closely tied to the notion that human beings consist of immortal spirits temporarily housed in physical bodies. According to this view after death our phyical bodies decompose and are no more. Our spirits, however, which are undying, are set free to return to heaven. It holds that what is most real about us spirit does not die; rather, at death of our body, our spirit is simply released to resume the existence it had prior to be joined to our body.
The Christian faith rejects completely the notion of immortality. For starters, it teaches that when we die, all our consitutents parts die; not just our body but also our spirit and even our soul. We truly, entirely cease to be. Second and that is what makes belief in resurrection so breathtaking exciting. God's love incarnate in Christ will not allow us to lie silent in the grave. In the end not even the death of all our consitutent parts can not separate us from the love of God. The Christian faith is confident that when we are resurrected, all our constituent parts will be resurrectd: not just our spirit and soul but also our body.
OK that would lead me to belief that when I die every thing ceases to exist and I must lie silent in the grave until the last days when my body is resurrected. What happens to the fact that Jesus said to the thief on the the cross " today you will be with me in paradise". No I don't belief that all my family that is dead is looking down on me and watching every move I make. The bible also states no tears in heaven, some of the things we all do would cause our past love ones to cry.
Hey, this is a heck of a time in my life to be struggling with this issue. Can someone clear this up for me. This idea they are saying is the christian belief sounds more jewish to me. I understood they do not believe in an after life.
Lesson: Life After Death
Resurrection is not immortality. Immortality is the Greek belief closely tied to the notion that human beings consist of immortal spirits temporarily housed in physical bodies. According to this view after death our phyical bodies decompose and are no more. Our spirits, however, which are undying, are set free to return to heaven. It holds that what is most real about us spirit does not die; rather, at death of our body, our spirit is simply released to resume the existence it had prior to be joined to our body.
The Christian faith rejects completely the notion of immortality. For starters, it teaches that when we die, all our consitutents parts die; not just our body but also our spirit and even our soul. We truly, entirely cease to be. Second and that is what makes belief in resurrection so breathtaking exciting. God's love incarnate in Christ will not allow us to lie silent in the grave. In the end not even the death of all our consitutent parts can not separate us from the love of God. The Christian faith is confident that when we are resurrected, all our constituent parts will be resurrectd: not just our spirit and soul but also our body.
OK that would lead me to belief that when I die every thing ceases to exist and I must lie silent in the grave until the last days when my body is resurrected. What happens to the fact that Jesus said to the thief on the the cross " today you will be with me in paradise". No I don't belief that all my family that is dead is looking down on me and watching every move I make. The bible also states no tears in heaven, some of the things we all do would cause our past love ones to cry.
Hey, this is a heck of a time in my life to be struggling with this issue. Can someone clear this up for me. This idea they are saying is the christian belief sounds more jewish to me. I understood they do not believe in an after life.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
